Ooh ‘ello!

Boring life update.

 

I have rain pouring down my windows. Nowt wrong with this I hear you say, but it’s on the inside.  Condensation building up like a muvva in every room of the place, I wouldn’t mind but it’s just me living there and I know I can blow out a lot of air, but really? This much? I’m going through tea towels like a bugger. Always ultra should invent pads for windows. 

I also have the pleasure of listening to my neighbours both beside me and above me, in surprising clarity. Next doors bedroom is next to mine. I am one for a good trump, but when you’re pumping it out, with surprising musicality, it’s always a bit embarrassing when your arse has piped down, and you just hear a little ‘a-hemmm…cough’, coming from the wall behind you. Every morning I get an insight into their domestic arrangements next door. He uses her wet towels, which she doesn’t like or understand it, he doesn’t care. Her dads got a pet name for him, and he doesn’t care. She always plugs in and blow dries her hair at 7am, which he then shouts over, and the other day, I think they were getting frisky and she said ‘no, stop that, that hurts’.  He didn’t care. She said it three times.

It’s like being in a house share. I might as well live with four other people as I get to be in their lives every flipping day as upstairs bangs about, scraping something around the floor for hours on end, and next door pretending to like each other.

I’ve just noticed that steven mulhern has dyed his hair. Sorry. Watching this morning.  

What else, I’m doing a show, on Friday, at the Lowry in Salford. It’s called The House That Stank of Death, it’s a sketch show, about…death. Do pop along if you fancy.

 

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